Dear Athena,

My hubby is wonderful, but he is a farmer and his nails are always rough. Sometimes they scrape the outside of my vagina, and it's sore for days. What can I use to heal the scratch quickly? Thank you.

Signed,

Nailed

Dear Nailed,

Ouch! Sometimes it's fun to mix pleasure and pain during sex. This is not one of those times.

Simple vaginal tears, like those you're experiencing from fingernail scratches, can be a common but unfortunate side effect of sex. Rough intercourse, vigorous fingering, awkward positions — all of these can result in soreness down there.

See your doctor if it's a deep cut or if you're experiencing major discomfort — it's possible you have an infection. But most light tears will heal on their own in a few days, like any other minor cuts. In the meantime, there are a number of ways to soothe your scratched vajayjay and feel better faster.

First, lay off all sexual activity — including masturbation — for a few days. Bummer, I know! But you're only going to reopen the wound if you jump back into bed before fully healing. Also, avoid tampons and tight or lacy underwear. In fact, you might be happiest going commando. Keep your lady bits clean with a daily shower or rinse, making sure to use gentle soap. Your doc might also recommend a topical ointment.

But don't settle for simply treating your scratches. Talk to your husband about caring for his calloused fingers and unkempt nails so this never happens again. I don't care what his job is; sex should not leave you wounded.

Let him know how much you enjoy your sexy time together but that it's causing you some pain. Gift him a nail file this Valentine's Day and make sure he knows to scrub and moisturize his hands before putting them on you. Ask him to wear gloves during his farmwork and use plenty of lube during sex to reduce friction from dry fingers.

If your husband is as wonderful as you say, none of this should be a problem. And until you get the results you want, tell him to keep his hands off and use his mouth instead!

Yours,

Athena