Some of us have simple dreams. One of mine was to make a turducken. I realized it when I headed to the Farmer's Kitchen at Turkey Hill Farm in Randolph. Watch in shock and awe as I learn to debone a turkey, chicken and duck, then stuff them into each other.

Once you've recovered, follow the easy recipe below to make a turducken breast of your very own. Then, read my article about turducken-making, with a sidebar about the turkeys who grew up in my house with me. Yes, inside.

Alice's Super-Easy Turducken Breast

1 whole bone-in turkey breast

3 boneless chicken breasts

1 boneless, skinless duck breast

Poultry pins

 

Stuffing:

1 small loaf sourdough bread

1 large apple, peeled and cored

1 tablespoon dried thyme

2 tablespoons dried sage

One cup chicken stock
 
Heat oven to 375 degrees. Tear sourdough into small chunks and place in a large bowl. Dice apples to desired thickness. Throw in herbs and mix in stock until texture is uniform.

With a boning knife, remove meat from turkey bone. You don't have any appendages in the way, so it should be smooth sailing. 

Once turkey is deboned, lay on a pan skin-side down. Lightly season with salt and pepper. Add chicken breasts, leaving enough turkey on each side to wrap around them later. Season chicken, then add duck breasts. Spread those liberally with stuffing.

Gather both sides of the turkey and hold together, as if pinning clothing. Thread pins through meat, first in one direction and then the other, to make sure each pin is in place. Do this until the contents are firmly sealed inside turkey. Place turducken in oven on a V-rack and cook 16 minutes for each pound. Super easy, right?