- So present was I on this date that I forgot to snap a pic of the two of us. Here is a staged recreation, which includes only me. I’ll get better at blogging, I promise!
As I mentioned last week in my introduction to this series, my husband, Ryan, and I recently spent an afternoon at the skatepark. Any images you might have of two kind-of-old-but-still-rad skate punks tearing shit up with abandon should immediately be stricken from your imagination. We had no idea what we were doing. But we had so much fun doing it.
Here are some reasons why a skate lesson is a great date:
1) Skateboarding is new to both of us. This puts us squarely within the Venn Diagram of vulnerability and potential personal growth. One of the most important things to me in a relationship is that the person I volunteered to spend my life with continues to grow and evolve as a human being, and that he encourages me to do the same. This applies on micro and macro levels, skateboarding obviously being an example of the former.
2) My husband and I were both psyched to try skateboarding. Though mutual interest in the date topic is not a requirement, it sure does make things go a lot smoother. Also, there’s research to back me up on this front.
3) A skate lesson is one hour long. Counting the time it took to drive to the skatepark, get our pads and helmets on and off, and drive home, we were out of the house for two hours. This makes a skate date the perfect option for squeezing something in when your husband is working on deadline. No excuses, my friends. No excuses.
Soooo… how was it? Well, first of all, you know things can’t go horribly wrong if you’re wearing pads and a helmet. And I mean that for life in general, not just the skatepark. We both looked kind of ridiculous — but in an adorable way. Looking ridiculous means feeling vulnerable and when you’ve been together for 13 years, that's refreshing.
[jump] As we worked our way from the micro-mini-ramp to the empty swimming-pool-like “bowl,” we took turns being the standout. Ryan conquered the ramp and moved on to practicing kick turns while I was still holding both the instructor's hands as I rolled down. But when I was able to go down holding just one of the instructor’s hands, Ryan sincerely and enthusiastically cheered. My husband cheered for me.
In the bowl, it was I who understood the notion and action of “pumping” to keep moving back and forth just a beat before Ryan did. I watched him trying his hardest and I saw what he was doing wrong. Because I know him a thousand times better than the instructor, I was able to explain the movement to him in a way that he immediately picked up. We were an awesome team.
The takeaway: We’d both do it again. Without hesitation. Learning how to do stuff that you didn’t feel "cool enough" to try in your teens or 20's is the best because you don’t care so much about looking cool. It’s a gift that getting older affords us, and one we can take advantage of together. Ryan looked the part of a hot young skater to me, and despite my inability to travel farther than a couple feet on my board, I felt like a hot young skater. Seeing your partner in a different light makes them more attractive and gives them this air of mystery that's a total turn on.
Moreover, we wanted each other to succeed. What an important thing to realize! When the resentment that builds up over everyday inequalities begins weighing down your relationship, it’s easy to forget that you want your partner to feel good about him or herself. You want your partner to feel proud. The tiny victories we experienced during our skate lesson were perfect reminders.
NEXT MONTH : Satori Float Spa (I know — a total wild card. I’m so curious!)
Talent Skatepark is located at 2069 Williston Rd. in South Burlington. Private one-hour lessons cost $35 per person. Call them at 864-2069 to schedule one.