At the beginning of the pandemic, I was suddenly unemployed and wondering how I was going to make rent. I signed up for the app SeekingArrangement and found myself a sugar daddy. He's 74 years old and has been paying me a weekly allowance to be his online girlfriend and text with him every day. Now that the vaccine is rolling out, I'm worried he'll want to meet up for sex, and I really don't want to do that. What's the best way to break it off?
Sugar Free (female, 30)
Dear Sugar Free,
The etiquette of online sugar dating is the same as in-person dating, and honest communication is a key factor. Did you set expectations when you began your arrangement? It sounds like you're not sure whether he would even want to meet up. If you haven't discussed it already, now is the time.
Even if your texts and chats have been sexual in nature, that's not a guarantee of anything happening in the real world. You are never obligated to have sex with anybody — ever. Be clear that you are only interested in virtual interactions and, if he wants more, he can move on. If he's cool with your boundaries, you may be able to continue your mutually beneficial relationship.
If you'd rather break it off entirely, you don't owe him any grand explanation. If you've enjoyed your time with him, just be polite about it and let him down easy.
Since the vaccine is being doled out partially based on age, your sugar daddy likely will get it way before you do, so you have some time to figure things out.
Good luck and God bless,