Sex is my life, and I'm good at it. So why did my guy dump me?
Lonesome Lover (male, 23)
Dear Lonesome Lover,
I was going to lead with "I hate to break it to ya," but I'm actually very happy to clue you in to this nugget of wisdom: Sex is not the most important thing in a relationship. Of course it can be fun and fantastic, but sex is only a teensy-weensy part of what makes a couple click.
I don't mean to downplay your talents, but pretty much anyone can be "good" at sex. It's not particularly difficult — unless you're going for some real fancy business. As director-comedian Mel Brooks once said, "Sex is like pizza. Even when it's bad, it's pretty good." It's much more of a challenge to find someone you're compatible with in other ways. Someone you can enjoy doing boring, everyday things with, because that's what makes up a good chunk of life — especially these days.
Your guy was likely looking for more than just a sex partner. If all the two of you shared was a great time in the sack, there was no real reason for him to stick around.
Do you really believe sex is your life? I suggest you get a few other hobbies. One of the keys to a deep, long-lasting relationship is being able to be your true self with someone. If all you offer is a delicious dive in the sheets, you may wind up splashing around solo in the shallow end of life.
Good luck and God bless,