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Making Headway

Mistress Maeve: Your guide to love and lust...


Published August 14, 2013 at 10:14 a.m.

Dear Mistress,

I have met a man that I like a lot. He is more sexually experienced than I am, but I’m not even curious about the number of women he’s been with — I am quite happy to reap the benefits of his schooling. Here’s the problem: I never enjoyed performing oral on a man before I met him. But now I really like it and want to make sure that I am “meating” his needs, so to speak. I have no problem asking him what he likes, and he has no problem telling me. So how do I get better at this? I’d really like to blow his doors off.


Making Headway

Dear Headway,

Kudos to you for finding a blow-worthy man, and even more kudos for not being intimidated by his wealth of experience. You’re right — you will only benefit from the time he has spent with other women.

It’s great that you and your beau openly communicate about what you like — that’s more than half the battle. To make sure your skills are up to snuff, I offer the following tips:

Watch your teeth. Since you’re rediscovering your fondness for fellatio, let’s start with the basics. Wrap your lips around your teeth, making a tight “O” with your mouth to avoid any dental disasters. Some dudes don’t mind a little nibble here and there, but that’s something you’ll want to run by him first.

Wetter is better. Avoid any kind of dry friction by keeping him well lubricated with your saliva. If he’s a dirty boy, you may even spit on his junk to keep things slipping and sliding properly.

Keep your eye on the prize. Let him know that you’re enjoying yourself by making frequent eye contact while you’re going down on him. The number one complaint I hear from men is that they hate it when women seem bored or belabored by blow jobs. Shoot him some sexy glances to assure him you’re loving every minute of it.

Don’t forget the bits and pieces: Blow jobs aren’t just for penises — your man’s erogenous zone includes the balls, taint and ass. Lightly swirling your tongue around his scrotum will likely drive him wild, as will licking the area between his balls and buttocks. Some guys are squeamish about their butt being penetrated, so be sure to ask before sliding a well-lubricated finger into his nether region. That said, for men who embrace anal play, the benefits can be mind-blowing.

Blown away,


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