I'm Almost 20, Single and Still a Virgin—Help! | Ask the Rev. | Seven Days | Vermont's Independent Voice

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I'm Almost 20, Single and Still a Virgin—Help!



Dear Reverend,

I'm 19 years old, almost 20, and I've always been single, and I'm still a virgin. I have friends that are girls, but I have never been in a relationship. I find dating awkward because I'm really introverted, and I've screwed up all my chances of talking to my crushes. Is there any hope for me? Help!

Still a Virgin

Dear Still a Virgin,

Good heavens! I'm surprised your penis hasn't fallen off by now! Just kiddin'. I'm no doctor, but I'm 99 percent sure that doesn't happen.

You're 19, for goodness' sake. Of course there's hope! You have loads of time for sexual escapades. I know plenty of people who didn't have sex for the first time until they were well into their twenties, and beyond. It's really no big deal. And I'll let you in on a little secret: Sex isn't as exciting as it's cracked up to be, unless you actually feel good about yourself and care about the person you're with. I'm not saying that because your mom told me to. It's a fact, Jack.

I had sex for the first time when I was 15 years old. Mostly because I wanted to get it over with and see what the all the hullaballoo was about. Sure, it was with the quarterback of my high school football team. And, sure, he wore a size 14 shoe — if you know what I'm sayin.' But if I could go back in time, I wouldn't go that route again.

Don't get me wrong. I don't regret that it went down that way, but truth be told, it was uncomfortable, kinda weird and not particularly enjoyable. But it makes for a fun story on occasion!

Are you really close with the girl pals you mention? You ever talk to them about this stuff? It might seem weird, but it probably wouldn't hurt to get some input from your peers of the feminine persuasion. I bet you could find a way to casually get on the subject sometime when you're shootin' the breeze. Here's another little tidbit for you. I've found that the best romantic relationships start out as friendships. That's also best when you don't see it coming, so don't even think about that too hard. Actually, forget I even said it.

Just remember, you're not going to be awkward and nervous forever. Chill out, enjoy the people you have fun with, and you'll find your groove. And that will surely attract someone who wants to get their sexy groove on with you.

Good luck and God bless,

The Reverend

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