I Like to Pleasure Myself but Struggle to Reach Orgasm | Ask the Rev. | Seven Days | Vermont's Independent Voice

Arts + Life » Ask the Rev.

I Like to Pleasure Myself but Struggle to Reach Orgasm

By

DREAMSTIME
  • Dreamstime

Dear Reverend, 

I really like to pleasure myself, but I'm struggling to reach orgasm. Any tips on how to do this? 

Buffy Muffin, Female, 18

Dear Buffy, 

If I held the secret to women having an orgasm every time, I would be a bazillionaire living on a private tropical island somewhere. Alas, that is not the case, but I do know a thing or two. 

First things first. Some medications, such as antidepressants, can throw a wrench in the works. If you are on any prescriptions, you should talk to your doctor about switching things up. He or she could also rule out any other medical conditions that might be at play. 

If none of that is the case, your issue may be all in your head. Thinking too hard about having an orgasm is a surefire way to make it not happen. Next time you're going solo, don't focus so much on the finish line. You need to relax and enjoy the ride in order to get there.

If you like baths, taking a long, hot one not only relaxes your mind but gets your circulation going in all the right places. Get in the mood by reading an erotic story or watching some sexy flicks. Changing up your technique could also help. If you always use a vibrator, try using just your hands — or vice versa. If you go at it for a long time, your lady bits can become over-sensitized, so remember to take a break once in a while.

Masturbation should be a pleasure, not a chore. So, get your head out of the game, relax and have fun experimenting along the way. 

Good luck and God bless, 

The Reverend

Fill out my online form.