An Old Friend Wants to Date My New Friend, but I Have Concerns | Ask the Rev. | Seven Days | Vermont's Independent Voice

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An Old Friend Wants to Date My New Friend, but I Have Concerns

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Dear Reverend,

An old friend of mine is interested in dating a newish friend of mine. I know the old friend very well, and he's more than a little nutty. He's also currently dating several other women. Should I warn my new friend about him and tell her to be cautious? Or should I let it play its course? I wouldn't want them to hit it off and then resent me for meddling. On the other hand, I don't want her to get hurt. Please advise!

Buddy Buddinski (male, 39)

Dear Buddy Buddinski,

I suppose it depends on what you mean by "more than a little nutty." Does your friend have some personality quirks, or do you think that he's dangerous? Is he abusive? Is he a criminal? Is he a mean jerk? If so, you may want to suggest that your new friend steer clear.

But if the guy is just a bit kooky, you should stay out of it. You don't want to scare your new friend away unnecessarily, and if your old friend found out that you did, it could really hurt his feelings.

I'm assuming that both of these people are grown adults who aren't new to the dating game, so they must know that meeting new people is a crapshoot. Speaking of, dating more than one person at a time isn't particularly unusual. As long as everybody is honest about it up front, there's no harm done.

Besides, if you don't know this woman all that well, how do you know that she won't enjoy his particular brand of nuttiness? Maybe they'll be the perfect match.

Good luck and God bless,

The Reverend

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