Is It OK to Break Up Via Text? | Ask Athena | Seven Days | Vermont's Independent Voice

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Is It OK to Break Up Via Text?


Published May 6, 2015 at 10:00 a.m.

Dear Athena,

I have been casually seeing this woman. Things are OK, but I'm sort of over it, and I've met someone else. I want to break up with her, but I sort of want to get it over with and just do it over a text. Or maybe an email is better? Is that OK?


Mr. Text Termination

Dear Mr. Text Termination,

No. Just no. I wish I could leave it at that. I wish you understood why breaking up with someone via text or email is so wrong. But it sounds like you need to be told.

I get it; we live in a technological age. You can order food, clothes and even wives online. You can Skype with someone in Timbuktu or take classes in China. But she's not in China. She's here. In the same area code. So be decent and do it in person.

Man up, and ask to see her. When you meet up, tell her you want to chat about something serious. Then, like the gentleman you need to explore becoming, tell her you've moved on. It's not that hard.

What are you so afraid of? That she might get upset in front of you? OK. You hurt someone. She'll get over it, and so will you.

A text is pathetic and cowardly. It's not like you're letting her know you'll be late for dinner; you're telling her you don't want to see her anymore. Just for a second, imagine yourself getting a text message like the one you want to send. Would you be cool with it? I doubt it.

Also, what if she doesn't get the text? That could happen. Then, while you think you're in the clear, she thinks you've dropped off the face of the Earth. Or worse, she bumps into you and your new flame at the movies. Real classy.

So break it off in person. Enough said.



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