Real VT: How NOT to win the heart of a satanist | 802 Online

Real VT: How NOT to win the heart of a satanist


In case you were curious, Friday Coffeeblogging's own "special blossom" Matt G. Paradise riffs on the difficulties of being a single Satan worshipper. In a post entitled, "Women who shouldn't be attracted to me, Matt, 37, describes the various types of girls he's encountered in recent years. This is interesting and entertaining window onto this particular subculture, which I confess I know little or nothing about.

Here's Matt on "the Satan Chic Appeal," which I never even knew existed:
To the chagrin of all of those harried housewives and uptightgod-fearing men, the human representation of Satan often gets thegirls. Regardless of the times, it still serves as societal Spanish Flyto select women.

I never knew! And Matt on the "Mysterious Guy Appeal":
Oh, please, gals. Get over your Tim Burton movie-garnered andmedia-derived fixations, and find yourself some complimentarilyuninspired and subculture-obsessed boy toy, posthaste. Maybe you caneven dress him up like The Crow. And wouldn't that be fun?

Yes, ladies, Matt takes his Satanism seriously. So what does it take to win his heart? I asked him Friday, and he essentially said he's not telling. One of his friends overheard my question and asked, "what heart?"